Fragments

Pine needles adorned with pearls of rain, forest green, thick milky skies.

I hear melodies in the hum of appliances. Cymbals in rattling pipes, scales in soaring airplanes.

Auburn leaves gently sweeping through the air in slow motion. Like the littlest petals. Bon Iver, maybe Bootstraps cooing. I am watching something unfold: a God-given moment.

“I love music that makes you look up at the sky”.

Muffin the kitten

I started the whole intro/extrospective thing and I can’t be bothered to edit that post every single time I learn something new or interesting. So I’m going to start a category I think.
  • Cats are affectionate. I’ve always thought they were kind of standoff-ish but my cousin bought a 40-day old British Shorthair and it is the cutest kitty I’ve ever seen. I looked up social cat behaviour and found that cats do this thing called ‘bunting’, where they rub their faces against you. They have glands on their cheeks, and rubbing against you is a sign of acceptance and affection- you’re part of the feline community! Also, slow blinks are apparently equivalent to cat kisses.
  • It’s awesome watching the baby learn and express behaviours that are obviously hard-wired in him. Muffin is adorable when he pounces on his feathery toy. His eyes narrow, never straying from the feathery tip, tail up and body hunched. He slinks closer to the toy and suddenly jumps, like a predator in the wild.
  • A stuttering problem when speaking in a native language can be lessened by speaking in a foreign language. Actors tend to lose their stutters when in character, and there are a surprising number of actors who stutter (Marilyn Monroe included). For some reason, an alter ego helps and people aren’t sure why. ??
  • I was talking to dad over dinner, learning about language acquisition. I love it when he talks like this and I always wonder if he’s going ‘lecture mode’ on me. Anyway, he talked about the semantics of an ‘or’ statement. Usually, when people say “do you want to watch the movie on Monday or Tuesday?” we assume that it’s either one or the other. Logically speaking, it should mean one or the other or BOTH. Perhaps the common assumption takes precedence as the ‘both’ option seems unnecessary.
  • Correlation between people with high IQ’s and illegal drug use. Why? Possibly high EQ and impulse control, possibly novelty seeking behaviour typical of intelligent people. Intrinsic motivation- a desire to learn for the pure pleasure of it.
  • “A possible pathway that emerges from the literature on personality is that high IQ individuals have also been shown to score highly on tests of stimulation seeking and openness to experience.”
    Read more at http://higherperspective.com/2014/05/people-higher-iqs-likely-use-illegal-drugs.html#90j1HwBbgYMyx5zS.99high IQ individuals have also been shown to score highly on tests of stimulation seeking and openness to experience.”
    White noise is the overlap of multiple frequencies- like the way white light is a combination of light waves. Black noise is effectively, no noise. There is pink, blue and purple noise, which sound like drones of different pitches. Blue is likened to the sound of sprinklers.
en·gag·ing
enˈgājiNG/
adjective
1. charming and attractive.

“Sophie had a sunny personality that was very engaging”
legit dictionary exemplar he he he
Is it just me or do you sometimes think: wow I can’t believe one word, my name, refers to everything that I am. When people say your name, do you ever snap your head up in response and realize that any request made or question asked links you so closely with a word? I know it’s not a profound thought… It’s more like a baby’s thought- but sometimes I feel like I’m discovering things for the first time (again).
  • I’m not good at visualizing words. When I spell things out loud, I pretend I’m typing. Somehow the letters come easier that way.
  • I hate the sound of sloshing water – added to the long list of sounds I hate. Ironing is the WORST.
  • When I fantasize about a happy place I always imagine having a child. My happy place is me telling my child a story that happened to me last year as if it happened 10 years ago. It’s my child telling me how school was. Or he/she is rambling as I’m trying to read or cook or something. Or that I’m slightly jealous that I’m not as good with kids as my husband is. Seriously that was what I was thinking before we were allowed to turn over the exam papers.
  • I stand by the idea that more sleep > more revision.

Misophonia

I think I have a mild case of this condition. I’m not even joking.  It’s literally the ‘hatred of sound’, and recently, I’ve been making a mental note of all these different sounds that not just irritate me but make me want to strangle something. On certain days I’m so enraged that the only way to stop myself from overturning a table, shouting and punching someone in the face is to remove myself from the scene, slam the door and sit in a corner with my fingers pressed against my ear drums. I do this until I calm down and am no longer a danger to the public (my family).

These are some of the sounds that drive me crazy:
1) Continuous burping. Please leave the house.
2) Quiet whispering like the kind you hear at the back of a classroom.
3) Pencil scratching on paper or the sound of pen points hitting the desk when there aren’t enough papers underneath to absorb the sound. Naturally, people don’t know that I have a problem with their writing habits. It’s worse during a test.
4) Loud chewing. Soft chewing with a mouth that opens every so often. Smacking lips, slurping, grinding, gulping. Sounds of mastication. If it lasts more than a minute or if I don’t have food myself (somehow it’s better if I join in), I start to get angry. It’s not just an oh it’s so annoying sort of thing; I feel a visceral, boiling anger rise from my chest. I imagine violent scenarios. And then I have to leave the room.
5) Breathing. I don’t get mad when people breathe around me (I’d have killed myself by now), but when people are sick and take laboured breaths/ wheeze, asldfjalsdjfasdf
6) The scrape of a spoon to get the last bits of food in a polystyrene cup, the repetitive clinking of chopsticks against a bowl – it’s all incredibly frustrating.
7) Repetitive sound of fingers or toes rubbing together. I will most certainly not cuddle with you if you flick your toes.

On good days, I can tolerate these sounds to a certain extent. If someone knows these sounds piss me off and starts to say, chew gum obnoxiously, I can handle it. I think.

It’s funny how I’m starting to notice that movements annoy me too. During the SAT exam, I saw a foot swinging out of the corner of my eye and I couldn’t concentrate. I saw fingers drumming and I had to turn away to ignore the annoying stimulus. Weird. At the moment these repetitive movements don’t evoke in me some aggressive impulse. And I hope it doesn’t develop.