I love my grandmother to pieces. I love her I love her I love her. I know she won’t be around forever but I will pray every day for her so that she may be even more blessed than she already is. I pray that she will one day see my children (or child) and that they will have the privilege of meeting her. This is what my heart aches for. Literally. I want it so badly it hurts. It’s slighty selfish because I feel like I need her; she strengthens my faith. And my prayer is really a three-in-one request.
1) I’ll have a husband
2) I’ll have a child and most importantly
3) that my grandmother lives to see her/him.
God’s will takes precedence over my plans. I just pray and hope that He’ll grant me these blessings.
“Pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
I Thessalonians 5:17-18
Sounds like a stupid challenge but the aim is to try and look after my nails. We had Girl Day yesterday and obviously, that involved getting our nails done. However, because of my nonexistent nail routine, I ended up just getting my cuticles cut and nails stripped of month-old nail polish I couldn’t be bothered to remove. I was advised not to do any more damage to my dry-ass nails. I knew they were unhealthy because they chip constantly, but I didn’t realize how bad they were. The nail expert was not impressed and I had to look away, pretending my hand did not belong to me.
Little things like healthy pink nails with clean white tips are the manifestation of effort and care (basically, I’m much too lazy).
The flesh is weak Lord, I am frail. I need You. All that I have comes from You – everything. Down to the last, minute details. I am Yours and she is Yours. Bless her with all that she deserves and give her strength and wisdom. Dampen her anxieties and alleviate her pains. Give her faith and show her love. Remind me of how much I love her and how much we both need You.
I shall pray for her daily.
I’m very good at doing everything besides work. I’m an expert. I go on facebook, refresh twitter a thousand times, walk back and forth from my kitchen back to my room and discover more things to eat. I take a shower for as long as I can (until I feel like a major contributor to Global Warming), or, as I did today, lie in a bathtub for as long as I can before my skin shrivels off.
This needs to stop. I don’t know why I can’t just confront the work! Am I just lazy? It’s weird because I can focus on anything: practice piano, write, speak spanish, or read when I’m supposed to be doing something else that requires half the effort. I can’t do what I’m supposed to do; I’m a chronic procrastinator. It’s a mental drag to force myself to attend to the task at hand, and when I do, I take such a long time to finish. I’m incredibly annoyed/frustrated with myself.
I’m going to challenge myself to do the next piece of work the day it is assigned. Or at least, start it.