I’m juggling so many thoughts. I’m trying to explain how I feel about each situation but no words do any justice. No one thing can define or logically separate the amalgamation of feelings that I am experiencing. Schachter–Singer theory at work right here. I’m trying to find labels for my emotions.
– – – – –
With the benefit of hindsight, I was stressed about having to finish my university applications on time, getting to know myself (for the apps), whilst trying to have fun with work nagging at me at the back of my mind. I felt like there was too much to do in too little time. I felt useless. Stuck. Unproductive. Trapped. I was wasting my time. Twisting and turning, doing things halfheartedly for the sake of doing something; everything I did amounted to nothing – or so I thought. Sometimes, the mind is so negative, irrational and yet so in control that I experience a sort of paralysis. If I were to just get up and try and enjoy myself or decide to do my work and get into it, the problems would gradually dissipate. The key is to take one step at a time when life seems insurmountable. And also to run (it does wonders).